Trump Turns Fountain To Shit

Everything he touches turns to shit.

Dear Humans,

HOLY SHIT! Donald Trump has now ruined another American reflecting pool.

Before we begin, please bless the little heart on this post so the Epstein class billionaires accidentally show it to many more people.

And if this newsletter makes you laugh, join today as a paid subscriber and help keep the #1 Humor publication on Substack independent, growing, and fighting back hard. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER!

1. Trump Turns Fountain To Shit

Jesus turned water into wine.

Donald turned water into shit.

Trump has spent weeks bragging about the historic fountain at Meridian Hill Park in Washington, D.C., where his administration spent millions of dollars “fixing” the water, only for the whole thing to turn brown.

He must’ve hired Brownwater Services.

Honestly, this shit fountain is THE ultimate metaphor for the entire Trump administration.

Everything he touches turns to shit.

The White House grounds. The Capitol. The economy. Gas prices. America’s alliances. The Justice Department. The military. Christianity. The National Mall. The first reflecting pool. America’s 250th birthday. The US Soccer team. This fountain.

You name it, he turns it to shit.

The man is a Shit Tornado. 💩 🌪️

He doesn’t have the Midas touch.

He’s got the Mierdas touch.

Oh. he’ll arrest people. He’ll blame Algaefa. But we all know it’s his fault.

Here is some video of Trump’s Great American Shit Fountain from a good man on the scene:

2. Speaking Of Huge Rivers Of Shit...

Scott Jennings would like everyone to believe he had a perfectly normal twenty minute phone conversation with Mitch McConnell.

Apparently every right wing influencer got an email from the Kremlin telling them to say they spoke with Mitch McConnell for about 20 minutes.

Then Kasie Hunt asked Scott Jennings on live TV if McConnell would be willing to call in to CNN.

Jennings was squirming HARD.

He’s obviously lying. After all, he gets PAID to lie for American Hitler. And he’s not even good at it. He is just SO mediocre.

Scott Jennings is a bad person and he’s going to Hell.

3. An Important Message From God

They are lying because they think they can get away with it.

They think if they repeat the lie enough times, you’ll shrug.

You’ll move on. You’ll stop paying attention. You’ll stop fighting. And on that day their lie will become the truth.

They’re counting on your exhaustion.

Good. Let them.

Because every time they tell another bald-faced lie, another decent individual out there blinks their eyes and wakes up.

We have to defeat these fascist liars.

And I believe we shall win in the end.

I have to believe.

And if you’re still here with God now, you believe too.

Because they cannot win.

4. Join the Rebellion

Scott Jennings gets paid to tell lies. I get paid to speak truth to power.

Scott Jennings gets paid to fellate fascists publicly. I get paid to shame people like Scott Jennings back to hell from whence they came.

Letters from God is now the #1 Humor publication on Substack. That didn’t happen because billionaires helped us. It happened because we are relentless.

Paid subscribers are the reason we can keep writing letters, making videos, doing live shows, and building cartoons. They help us tell the truth while billionaire media corporations keep paying people like Scott Jennings to lie to your face.

This is how we keep growing. This is how we keep fighting.

So if this post made you laugh, made you feel less alone, or reminded you that these people are not invincible, join our community today as a paid subscriber.

We’ve built something real.

Now let’s make it impossible to ignore.

Love,

God