God Takes The Day Off

What I'm doing to detach from reality this Sunday..

Dear Humans,

Lo, it’s God’s day off today.

Today I shall not smite, nor thunder, nor scroll through your cursed timelines. Instead, I’ll be trying to relax and have some fun.

So I thought it would be fun to share some of the joys I’ll be experiencing today.

I slept through church for the millionth time and now I’m in my pink bathrobe and sandals, surrounded by some dank purple haze, living the sacred life of rest.

After a delicious breakfast of eggs and french toast, I fired up Super Return of the Jedi on My Super Nintendo machine.

Lo, Emperor Palpatine fell before God’s lightsaber, but verily, escaping the exploding Death Star is proving to be freaking impossible.

I don’t know how Lando did it.

God keeps crashing into the walls and blowing up. This is what I’m up against here.

Later I’ll be eating pizza and yelling at football like a mortal. “That is NOT pass interference!!” I will shout at the TV with rage.

And then I’ll nap so hard I’ll wake up wondering if the Rapture happened without me.

Verily, then I’ll take a stroll in some nature and touch the green grass.

Ya know, even God gets tired. The world is heavy. There are some days when I think about packing it up and leaving the planet entirely. But then I remember you.

This community makes the struggle worth it.

You’ve laughed, shared, and stood with me through madness. That’s no small thing.

You are living proof we don’t have to face this all alone.

This is how I see you all. You’re so cute.

So take my advice. Do what I do.

Log off for a bit. Commune with nature.

Hug someone you love.

Yell at football.

Play some videogames.

Or listen to Nemik’s Manifesto from Andor one more time.

Rest is holy too. Whatever gets you through the night, it’s alright.

And now, as a blessing for your Sunday, here’s a puppy chewing on a big dog’s nose. Proof that gentleness still exists in this world, and that’s enough.

Bless you, humans!

Love,

God

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What My readers are saying:

"God, you are the best! You can make me laugh or at least feel better even on days that look so dark! Please keep up doing what you are doing." — Barb