Dear Humans,
Well, well, well. Turns out, when you worship a con man, you eventually get conned. The same Christians who backed Trump as their political savior are now furious—because he just defunded them. Let’s break it down.
1. Trump’s Religious Task Force
At the National Prayer Breakfast, Trump announced a Religious Discrimination Task Force to protect Christians from so-called “anti-Christian bias.” Which doesn’t at all sound like something that could turn into the Spanish Inquisition.
So let me get this straight. they have to stop all DEI everywhere, but DEI for Christians is still ok?
Oh and also Donold just destroyed USAID, which cut funding to Christian charities. Doesn’t cutting their funding count as anti-Christian discrimination?
2. Christians Beg Racist Conman for Mercy
Evangelical leaders and MAGA diehards are now begging Trump to undo his USAID cuts, which just crippled faith-based charities.
Even Catholic Relief Services—which literally feeds starving children—had their funding slashed. Missionary programs, evangelical outreach efforts, and humanitarian projects? All cut.
Now they’re demanding an explanation. They won’t get one from him, so allow God: ….ahem….WHAT THE HELL DID YOU THINK WAS GOING TO HAPPEN?
Shutting down USAID isn’t just some abstract budget cut—it’s a death sentence for countless children, families, and communities that rely on it for food, medicine, and stability. And for what? Just so a bunch of fascist criminals can steal even more money?
3. MAGA Christians Shocked To Realize They Got Played
When these people realize they were wrong, it provides me with fuel for the fight. Their pain gives me strength. Or is it hope?
“WTF is wrong with us?” I ask myself that question every single day.
America First? No, it was, “America, first I’m going to build a casino in Gaza.”
4. God’s Final Word
Does anyone else feel exhausted?
I hear you. I feel that way too. The nonstop onslaught from the evil empire is enraging and heartbreaking all at once.
But as AOC said:
"If you're feeling overwhelmed, that’s what Trump wants."
His entire strategy is to exhaust you with chaos and cruelty so you feel powerless. Don’t fall for it. It’s mostly theatrics.
The national 50501 protests will be ongoing.
The growing backlash proves this isn’t over.
The American people will fight back when pushed.
5. Join the Rebellion
Donold’s supporters don’t care if they lose their jobs or their freedom or anything as long as he is performatively ‘owning the libs.’ That’s how much they have been taught to hate you.
We’re risking everything to stand against him and his goons, bringing truth and laughter to the fight. Your support doesn’t just keep this radical leftist network alive—it’s a stand for resistance, survival, and the freedom to call out miserable pricks like him.
"I support your work to help me stay sane. I love your political satire since I no longer have a country I can call my own. Never thought that I would find myself living in a freaking autocracy." — Tom
"I support as many truth tellers as I can and God is the truthiest out there!” - Angela
So if you’ve been waiting for a sign, this is it. To celebrate 8 months of smiting ignorance, we’re offering 20% off—but only until midnight tonight. Think of it as an investment in the forces of truth and satire.
Click here to claim your blessing and fight alongside us.
Now go forth, spread the memes, and remember: laughter is holy, but fixing the system is divine.
Love,
God
But hey, God, you got a mention by Heather Cox Richardson yesterday!
BREAKING NEWS: Face-eating leopards gorge themselves on two-faced hypocrites