Dear Humans,
Thank you for being here. Right-wing billionaires own every single major news network. But they don’t own us. You’re the only reason God’s left wing newsletter still exists. If you’re able, please join today as a subscriber.
And now God shall attempt to process the latest insanities. Ahem…
…and God looked upon the world and said, “Holy fucking shit, things are really bad.”
LET GOD RECAP.
In the last three days:
Trump bombs Iran, kills their leader.
Dances in Maralago’s ballroom as those bombs are killing children.
Unilaterally decides that the USA is at war with Iran, without Congress or the Constitution’s involvement.
Jokes about his new golden ballroom while 6 US soldiers get killed.
Deploys ‘wife’ Melania to lead a UN Security Council meeting.
And lo, according to reports from the Military Religious Freedom Foundation, at more than 30 military installations, U.S. commanders explicitly told troops the war on Iran is a ‘Christian war to bring about Armageddon and the return of Jesus.’
JESUS CHRIST!!!
A month ago, these same commanders were pressuring soldiers to go see ‘Melania.’ Just horrifying.
My heart is with these service-members. They’ve already been put through Hell. And now they are expected to die for Donald’s latest distraction, Operation Epstein Fury.
And as for this idea that this is a Christian war? God is here to tell you that is utter bullshit. Let me put this in words even a Trumper will understand.
JESUS WAS NOT ABOUT WAGING WAR! HE WAS ALL ABOUT GIVING PEOPLE FREE BREAD AND FREE UNIVERSAL HEALTHCARE!! WHAT KIND OF MORON STILL THINKS JESUS WANTS TO COME BACK? HE ALREADY DIED FOR YOUR SINS…AND FOR WHAT? AMERICAN CHRISTIANS REPAID HIM BY ELECTING, AND RE-ELECTING, DONALD FUCKING TRUMP. JESUS IS NEVER COMING BACK, OKAY? FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, GROW UP. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER.
Can God get a fucking amen?!
DO GOD ONE FAVOR TODAY.
If you see or hear anyone saying that God supports Operation Epstein Fury so that Jesus can come back, you have God’s permission to absolutely lose your shit on them.
Just totally fucking crash out.
Go hard. Call into question their mental condition. Mock their botched plastic surgery. Use the kind of words that are only allowed in Australia.
Then call your representatives and shout at them, too.
One day at a time, humans.
Love,
God
PS - Remember that every like, share, and subscription keeps us pushing back on Christian nationalism and the Project 2025 machine. Make it so.
Where are the military commanders who told the troops that they didn't have to follow unlawful commands? Where are the people of conscience? Where are the Epstein files?
If these maga “christians” want the end times so badly then they should go to the war zone and fight it for themselves. Leave the rest of us out of their delusional fantasies.