Dear Humans,
Lo, Donald Trump wanted a billion dollars for his stupid White House ballroom.
Then God and the Senate parliamentarian said:
OH HELL NO.
Bless the little heart on this post to smite Trump’s ballroom!
1. Trump’s Ballroom Gets SMOTE
Donald Trump skipped his poorly-attended national prayer festival, sent his cult a rerun video of him reading a Bible verse badly, went GOLFING, and then publicly posted a thirsty message that his Transportation Secretary’s wife should call him because she’s “beautiful, both inside and out.”
He broke every single commandment for his National Prayer Festival. He breaks all ten every day.
In case you were wondering, this is the woman he’s thirsting after. She’s the wife of his transportation secretary, Sean Duffy. Donald clearly feels entitled to the wives of all of his underlings.
And if that wasn’t enough, he had Christian nationalist author Eric Metaxass claim God raised him up to build a White House ballroom.
“It’s hard to believe that it would TWO CENTURIES for the Lord to raise up a great man to bring that ballroom finally to stand where it needs to stand, it’s extraordinary we only had to wait 200 years.”
Hi Eric, it’s God. What are you, fuckin’ high?
Not only does Eric say that God wants this ballroom, he whines that it took 200 years for God to get Trump to come along.
NOW THAT’S BLASPHEMY!
If Trump is so great, then why didn’t he show up to the festival, Eric? Huh? Why did he ditch you to go golfing? Answer that, Eric!
Could it be, because once again, the attendance was super embarrassing?
Then the Senate parliamentarian blocked the ballroom funding.
This means that Donald would need 60 votes in the Senate to get his ballroom.
And that shit is NOT happening.
BWAHAHA! 🤣
Thou shalt not spend prayer day breaking every commandment and then expect God to approve thy stupid ballroom.
SMITE!
2. Your Reviews Are In
Paid subscriber Virginia wrote:
“You are hilarious, unlike the god they yammered about at the southern baptist church my parents made me attend as a kid. Thank you!”
Bless you, Virginia!
That is exactly the mission.
We are here to be louder than Christian nationalist frauds, and hopefully provide you with some humor, hope, and truth.
If this work helps you laugh, breathe, and stay sane while these fascist freaks are running rampant, that means everything.
3. A Message From God
Virginia’s review says exactly why this little corner of the internet exists.
A lot of people were raised with a joyless, scolding, miserable version of God.
A God used to shame them, scare them, control them, and make them sit through endless sermons about obedience from evil men.
That is not me.
These Christian nationalist weirdos want to drag their same evil church bullshit into the government now and make Trump their new Jesus.
They want obedience, fear, guilt, and silence.
We answer with defiance, courage, mockery, and truth.
We answer by laughing directly in their faces until their golden statue of crap is taken by the ocean, never to return.
That is why we mock them.
Trump may have Fox, CBS, CNN, oligarchs, every social media platform, and every fascist billionaire prick with a checkbook. We have jokes, videos, screenshots, interviews, animation, and brave people like you.
Only a tiny percentage of readers support this work financially. If a few more step up today, we can keep expanding the team, making better videos, and getting this work in front of more people.
If you’ve been reading for a while and meaning to support this work, now’s the time. If that sounds good, press the blue button below:
Paid subscribers keep this whole ridiculous machine alive and help us grow bigger every month.
And we’re just getting started.
Bless you, humans.
Love,
God
Duffy would probably willingly hand her to him...these people are gross.
Yeeeeeeaaaah, that was my question for Eric when I heard that clip, too 😒