Bless Mamdani For Reducing NYC’s $12 Billion Deficit To Zero

This is how you do it.

Dear Humans,

Lo, the democratic socialist mayor the corporate establishment warned you about just announced that New York City’s $12 billion budget deficit is gone.

The budget is fully balanced.

And it only took him 5 months!

1. HARK! Democratic Socialism Works!

Mayor Mamdani announced that New York City’s budget is FULLY balanced while still funding parks, libraries, safer streets, and historic investments in public housing. WOW!

So naturally, I would like to check in on every billionaire, landlord, racist, lobbyist, consultant, Cuomo-supporting corporate Democrat, Republican, bigot, and columnist who spent months hyperventilating that this delightful young man with big ideas would somehow destroy New York City.

How are you feeling now, JERKS?!? Cry more! 😂

How utterly validating. Democratic socialism finally got a chance. And it worked. As we always knew it would.

2. The Billionaires Fought Him

Let us remember what actually happened here. Billionaires from both parties fought Mamdani tooth and nail.

And why? Because they knew exactly what would happen if he succeeded.

People would notice. People would get a taste of how wonderful taxing the billionaires can be. The idea would prove hard to contain. Next thing you know, billionaires might actually have to pay some taxes for once. And your life would be improved.

The one thing they don’t want you to have is hope.

3. God’s Final Word

Bless Mayor Zohran Mamdani!

Corporate media told us that democratic socialism would destroy New York overnight. Instead, the budget is balanced, and social services are fully funded.

This is what happens when forward thinking progressives are given half a chance. This is why the CORRUPT people fought him so hard. Not because they knew he would fail. Because they knew he would succeed.

And lo, he did.

The billionaires were wrong. The left was right. And now every city in America should be asking: why not us?

I’m here to bless the workers and mock the oligarchy.

I’m here to remind the billionaires that Jesus is very much not down with their pedo-klepto-techno-fascist nightmare.

I’m here to smite their lies…and I’m ready to fight.

4. Join the Rebellion

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Love,

God